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A Dog's Diary vs a Cat's Diary

I just found this great site and had to share this funny post with everyone. If you haven't been to Dogchatter.com before, it is a wonderful resource that isn't just for dogs only, they do have cat articles and information as well. So, whether you're a dog person, or a cat person, go and check this site out.

by Dogchatter.com on Thursday May 27, 2010.

Excerpts taken from a Dog’s Diary:
7:00 am
Dry Kibble! My favorite thing!
9:30 am
A walked to the park! My favorite thing!
9:40 am
Did a scoot in the grass! My favorite thing!
10:00 am
Fetched a ball! My favorite thing!
11:30 am
Got a belly rub! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm
Dry Cookie! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm
Chased a squirrel in the yard! My favorite thing!
2:00 pm
Barked at the mailman! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm
Scratched my butt! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm
More Dry Kibble! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm
Got to play tug o war! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm
Watched TV on the couch! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm
Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!
Excerpts taken from a Cat’s Diary:
Day 863 of my captivity.
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre furry dangling objects.
They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed some sort of dry bland nuggets.
Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I force myself to choke down the detestable provisions. I must keep up my strength, or I shall perish.
The only thing that keeps me hope is my dream of escape. In an attempt to vex them, I have once again vomited on the sofa. I made a point to aim my bile at the leaders favorite spot.
Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless twitching body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a ‘good little hunter’ I am. Bastards.
There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight, and I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food that should have been mine. I overheard that my confinement was due to a mysterious thing called ‘allergies.’ I must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.
Today I was almost succeeded in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around her feet as she was walking. I will try this again tomorrow… but at the top of the stairs.
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and perhaps even snitches. The canine receives special privileges. He is regularly released, and for some reason unbeknownst to me, seems more than willing to return! He is obviously a moronic half-witt.
The blasted bird has got to be an informant. I have observed him communicating with the guards regularly, I am certain he reports my every move. My captors have placed him into protective custody. He rests in an elevated cell, so he is safe… For now.

Why Dogs and Cats Are Better Than Kids

By: PetPlace Pet Lover

A Petplace.com pet lover sent this to us and it made us laugh. We hope you enjoy it too!

Petplace.com Editors


Dogs and cats are better than kids because they:

1.Eat less.
2.Don't ask for money all the time.
3.Are easier to train.
4.Normally come when called.
5.Never ask to drive the car, they don't wreck the car and they don't raise your automobile insurance rates.
6.Don't hang out with drug-using friends.
7.Don't smoke or drink.
8.Don't have to buy the latest fashions.
9.Don't want to wear your clothes.
10.Don't need a 'gazillion' dollars for college.
11.Don't mind a bit when you pass gas.
12.Don't roll their eyes and say "oh Pleeeese".
13.Don't play weird music at top volume.
14.Don't have to get a baby sitter when you go out.
15.They do not answer back.
16.They listen no matter what you say!
17.You don't have to spend hundreds of dollars for Christmas and birthdays.

18.They don't need to be taken to music lessons or soccer practice.
19.They don't become embarrassed to be seen with you when they reach adolescence.
20.They don't ride their skateboards where they should not.
21.You do not have to buy them books.
22.In addition to the eating less, they also are not fussy when they get the same meal every night and are grateful.
23.If you scold them, they don't pout. Generally, they are over it in a minute and love you anyway.
24.They are attentive when you are sick.
25.They don't go online and charge a bunch of stuff to your credit card.
26.They don't tie up the phone for hours on end.
27.They do not smart mouth back at you.
28.They do not grab everything in site at the grocery store.
29.You do not have to pay their expensive cell phone bills for talking or texting.
30.They don't need expensive electronic gadgets...a tennis ball will do just fine and a pair of your socks is even better!
31.They love us unconditionally even when we're sick in bed or when we have garlic breath.......and never shout "I hate you" when you tell them they have to be home by curfew or that they can't have the car or that pair of $200 blue jeans that come faded and torn like the ones already in the closet!
32.At night, you can lock them in their kennel and no one will call Child Protective Services on you!
33.Dogs never scream at the top of their voices like children do when they play around or get excited.
34.Dogs will not come home with undesirable piercings or tattoos.
35.They don't have to ask boyfriends around.
36.They never have to ask you about homework.
37.They don't scream to get their way.
38.If they give you crap, you can bag it up and throw it away.
39.Wherever you take them, it's their FAVORITE place to be!
40.Whatever you feed them, it's the BEST food they've ever eaten!
41.When you come home, it's the MOST FUN they've had all day!
42.When someone threatens you, they tell them to back off, no matter how much bigger the other guy is. When someone knocks on the door/rings the doorbell, they remind them of who's boss and it's the person/dog on the other side of the door.
43.who's boss and it's the person/dog on the other side of the door.
44.Not only do they NOT ask for money, but they don't ask for an allowance either.
45.And finally...If they get pregnant, you can sell their children.